Chasing Calm
Random lessons in life, love, and transition. — From Los Angeles, California to Stuttgart, Germany — March 2010

My Friend, My Lover, My Inspiration


The longer we are apart, I suppose it’s only natural that my desire for SS should only increase. I’m missing her terribly as my best friend and lover. Though a day never passes where we don’t talk by phone, I miss having our cerebral conversations where I can see the movement in her eyes, the unique way she rubs her chin and stares at nothing in particular when in thought, or the way she smiles and seems almost embarrassed when I tell her how beautiful she is.

But, everyday I grow more and more frustrated in wanting to be there beside her, wanting to again hold her in my arms so she feels protected and safe, wanting to massage her stomach and imagine the new movement I may feel in a few short months. Waiting seems to be torture, and  right now, I don’t know patience.

We are approaching a brand new chapter in both of our lives in so many ways, and now I have accepted (albeit temporarily) leaving my beloved sunny Southern California for the  dramatically different landscape and lifestyle of Stuttgart, Germany. It is because of our obvious love and adoration for one another that I feel so enthusiastic for the adventures of tomorrow.

I should admit what I also so desperately miss in not having SS close is our physical love. Unlike any other previous experience without question, our intimacy is on a whole other level and this is so very welcomed. Our love communicates not only with our bodies, lips, and hands, but within our spirit.  Passion envelopes us from the inside out.

Emotionally we are fulfilled and blatantly thankful for the love we’ve finally found in one another just when we both had almost given up. I think I’ll remind her how much I love her… right now.


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